Showing posts with label Madonna. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Madonna. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Like Mother like Son: Madonna raises african son to be a conceited asshole...


Whats up world. Good to see you again, as we relaunch to keep you bitches up on whats hot in the world of messiness. Apparently is didn't take Madonna's African orphan son David long to get all corrupted by Madonna's bitchiness! Check out what happens when he meets his 'poor' father again for the first time.


What I do like about the story though, is when David acts up, Madonna whips that ass! That's what I am talking about.


TAZ


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Madonna's adopted son David was reunited with his biological father yesterday for the first time since the toddler left Malawi with the singer in 2006. Yohane Banda met his child at 7am at the Kumbali Lodge where Madonna and her family are staying. But the peasant farmer, who gave David up for adoption when his wife died weeks after childbirth, revealed his son did not recognise him.'He asked me who I was,' Yohane said after the scheduled meeting, which lasted two-and-a-half hours. 'When I told him "I am your daddy" he looked surprised.'Mrs Wilo, an official from Madonna's Raising Malawi charity, acted as a translator between David and Yohane, who does not speak English.Yohane continued: 'It's amazing how David has grown; I can't believe he is the same small and sickly baby we left at Home of Hope. 'He seems to be a polite boy for he asked if he could sit on my lap. Then he started playing with my nose; I don't know why.'He is quite chatty and intelligent. He asked me lots of questions about lots of things. He asked me whether I ride horses. ‘I told him horses are for the rich and he asked me why I am poor. 'He told me his mum likes riding horses and that he too rides horses.'The he told me a story when one day he and his brother, Rocco, rode horses and fell. He told me his mum spanked him because they are not supposed to ride horses on their own.' Yohane revealed how David spoke warmly of his adoptive parents.'He told me his mum plays music and asked me what I do for life,' he said.'I told him I was a farmer. He asked what a farmer does and I explained to him that we use hoes to till the land. 'He told me his daddy, Mr Ritchie, took him to a farm but it had a tractor. I told him in Africa we use hoes.'Yohane, who has since married a new wife, Flor, and now has a young son, Dingiswayo, said he was disappointed to learn of Madonna's divorce from Guy Ritchie. 'He seems to like his daddy, Mr Ritchie, so much that I was a little sad Madonna broke up with him. 'I would have loved it if they sorted out whatever problems they had instead of divorcing because divorce is bad for kids.'Yohane lost two sons prior to David's birth and says he is relieved Madonna is taking care of the toddler. 'I was very happy to meet David again. He reminds me of the two sons I lost in infancy. 'I sometimes shudder to think that David could also have met the same fate had Madonna not adopted him. I am really grateful to her for saving David from possible early death.'Madonna and her two other children Rocco, 8, and Lourdes, 12, also met briefly with Yohane. 'She just greeted me and told me about David's school. She is a sweet lady,' he said. 'She told me David was clever at school. She then told me the children needed to take a bath because they were preparing to go out.'Later that day, Madonna took her children for a tour of the Mphandula child care centre built by Raising Malawi about 30 miles from the capital of Lilongwe. The singer and her family arrived in the impoverished African country on Sunday and she is hoping to leave with a new addition to her brood - four-year-old Mercy James. A judge will rule on Friday whether the 50-year-old should be allowed to adopt a second child from the country.Mercy was placed in an orphanage after her 18-year-old mother died five days after her birth. It was reported that her father was a schoolboy and it is not clear whether he is alive. Madonna's determination to adopt Mercy was said to be a major cause of conflict between her and Guy, who was opposed to the idea.Last year, he was said to have relented but soon afterwards the couple separated.Source: Daily Mail

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Fuck McCain and Obama, The A list celebrity is having the best year ever.


It seems like the A list celebrity is really the winner this election year. No matter what they say, positive or negative, the best way to get free promotion in 2008 is to have Obama or McCain mention your name in the press.

Lets start with Messy Jesse Jackson. He needed some exposure seeing that Obama is what is black and cool these days, so he calls Obama the N-word.

This was free exposure for him and his son. Maybe he can write a book about it or get paid a couple of hundred thousand in his next speaking engagement.

Britney Spears and Paris Hilton received free exposure as McCain compared Obama's new found celebrity to the two bimbos. Britney used it to garner attention for her 14th comeback since becoming a coke whore psycho, and Paris struck back in her own ad and called McCain an old man.

Toby Keith concurred that the world likes Obama because he talks like a Caucasian. I'm thinking "really Toby, have you heard how you speak? If Obama is speaking like a Caucasian you must speak like something alien because you sound a hot ass mess."

Ludacris came out with some ass backwards rap attack and garnered attention for his upcoming project, and now the Queen of Pop, Madonna, has started a heated battle more intense than her last botox session with McCain just in time for her new world tour.

Also, it seems the coolest fashion pieces in Hollywood these days have an image of Obama on the front. I never witnessed a time where so many celebs were supporting one candidate this much.

Anyways...Here is something to read up on as far as Madonna VS McCain.

LMAO

TAZ

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The campaign of John McCain went head-to-head with Madonna today after the 50-year-old pop diva appeared to compare the Republican candidate to Hitler and Robert Mugabe.

Madonna, who kicked off her “Sticky and Sweet” world tour at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff yesterday, made the swipe during a performance of Get Stupid, when Mr McCain’s image was flashed up alongside images of the Führer and Zimbabwean dictator, as well as destruction and global warming.

In a none-too-subtle contrast, Barack Obama was bracketed in a subsequent sequence alongside Mahatma Gandhi, John Lennon and Al Gore.

A McCain campaign spokesman, Tucker Bounds, condemned the segment. “The comparisons are outrageous, unacceptable and crudely divisive all at the same time,” Mr Bounds said.

“It clearly shows that when it comes to supporting Barack Obama, his fellow worldwide celebrities refuse to consider any smear or attack off limits."

The McCain campaign has recently been keen to portray Mr Obama as a celebrity, underpinning what it says is his lack of depth and experience.

In one McCain attack advert, the Democratic candidate is juxtaposed with Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. The latter was quick to make a spoof ad of her own, lampooning Mr McCain as an old man.

Madonna is no stranger to controversy on tour. In 2006 she staged a mock crucifixion only a few miles from the Vatican during the "Confessions" tour.

The Madonna tour is her first since striking a deal with the concert promoter Live Nation Inc, which is worth an estimated $120 million over 10 years. The partnership gives Live Nation a stake of future music and music-related business she generates, including touring, merchandising and albums.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Mess of the Week..."Madonna and Child"...




I don't know if its possible as a christian to call the "Madonna and Child" ugly, but in the case of the pop star and her daughter, they are a hot ass ugly mess. Somebody run quickly and get Madonna a cheesecake Diddy style. Close all the gyms and yoga studios around her cause she is over doing it, and open more salons to help her daughter handle her mustach and unibrow situation.

...And what is with Madonna's cheeks and sassy arm veins?

I understand getting caught cheating on your husband with baseball players the same week your brother releases a tell all book is tough, but still you get an "Oh Hell No" for looking so messy.

Oh hell no.
Lady get it together. People paid too much money for your tour tickets to have you having a damn break down right now.

TAZ

Sunday, June 1, 2008

STAR WARS: The Battle where your only weapons is your star power...




This week's battle takes place at the Cannes Film festival. The battle scene is a benefit auction, and the warriors are Madonna, hot off the heels of a number 1 album, and stealing a black baby from Africa; Sean 'Diddy' Combs; and George Clooney.




Round one easily went to Madonna who outclassed Diddy by merely taking lip gloss out of her purse, using it, and watching it sell for $472,000.00. Diddy was offering up 24-hours with Diddy which means you could hang with the mogul and super-ego for an entire day. It went for a mere $314,000.00. Madonna also saw a guitar from her last tour go for $472,000.00 as well.




Guess Diddy isn't the star he thought he was.




Then came the real war. Madonna VS George Clooney. The weapon was Sharon Stone. Last year a Sharon Stone/Clooney kiss went for $700,000.00. Ever the super ego, Madonna demanded a million for a smooch with co host Sharon Stone, and the crowd looked at her old ass as if she had bumped her head. Who wants to see too old gals kissing? Desperate, Madonna declared she would serenade fans backstage, and still even only got $550,000 for that.




Super Loser: Diddy


Loser: Madonna


Winner: George Clooney, AIDS victims the money went to, and Taz Jonez for not having to see two old gals kissing. If I want to see old broads co habitating, I'd watch the Golden Girls re runs with my gay Uncle Jarvis.




TAZ

Friday, May 2, 2008

Madonna is giving vintage Debbie Harry for her BET 106 & Park debut!!!


Its official. Madonna cements her position as rappin granny as she makes her first appearance on BET, besides the time she was seen hanging back stage with her BFF, 50 Cent.


For her appearance on 106 & Park, the material rapper has went back in her closet for her best RunDMC look alike jewelry.


I love pop culture. Madonna on 106 & Park? I never would have guessed. Her video for "4 Minutes" made is BET debut yesterday at number 10.


TAZ

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

WOW...Even having the face of a decomposing old hag can't stop Madonna from ruling the charts...


Madonna's album was released yesterday to some of the best reviews of her career. I brought the album, and I have to say, I actually really like it. Especially the jam with Kanye West and one called "The Devil Couldn't Recognize You" or some shit like that. Either way, get this album. There is even a rumor flying around that granny will be on BET's 106 & Park. How fun is that?


Right now her album is expected to hit number 1 in the states with a little under 300,000 sold. A far cry from Whoriah's uninspired album, but sexy neverless.


Holla


TAZ

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Sassy Mariah Carey may or may have not been throwing darts at a few pop divas....What do you think?


First Mimi disses the one bitch that I'm loving right now, Leana Lewis(I think that's her name), and now she is going for her Madgesty, also known as hip hop granny, also known as Madonna.


If you ask me, Mimi's ass is still salty about Madonna rough housing her for the grammy performance when she was so called having the biggest comeback in music history. Whatever Mimi.


TAZ

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From Perez:


Mariah Carey recently did an interview for Spain's Shangay Express magazine. And she took a few not-too-subtle digs at the one and only Madonna!A reporter from the magazine flew to New York to interview Miz. Carey and witnessed the divaness first-hand. First, the album listening that was scheduled for 6pm was postponed ’til 9pm. The interview, which was supposed to take place at 9pm was posted to midnight. Then after hours of waiting, at 2:30am, they cancelled the interview since Mimi was too tired. The next day, the reporter was invited to attend an MTV TRL taping. In total, Mariah had 11 people surrounding her, consisting of bodyguards, assistants, makeup peeps, label reps and wardrobe assistants. Now that's the way to travel!Finally, the reporter gets the interview, with 3 hours left to spare before their flight departs.Some of the highlights from the interview include:


- When the reporter asks if Mariah's obsessed with portraying an unreal image of herself via photoshop, Mariah denies the claim stating that everyone uses photoshop in the business. Everyone.


- When asked about Madonna (how dare that reporter mention that name infront of Mimi!!!) and how she feels about her Madgesty recording an R&B album, Mariah responds that it's "interesting." Then pauses, and continues, "It's very interesting."


- When the reporter mentions that Madonna worked with Pharrell (who also worked with Mimi), she asks if Mariah gave her some indirect inspiration. Carey responds, "I don't know, I don't have any idea about her intentions. I'll just say that it's very interesting."


- When questioned about creating her own clothing line, Mimi responds, "I'm working on my own collection of lingerie, darling. Why shouldn't I dedicate myself to under garments?"


- And when asked if her "diva demands" get worse over time, she responds, "What is over time? What is a diva? I know a lot about divas because it's a word I've heard ever since I was a little girl, because my mom is an opera singer. Diva demands? I don't think I have any. I'm a person who can take care of myself, you believe me, right?"Riiiiiiiiiight.You be starting a girlfight, Mimi!

Thursday, April 3, 2008

A Janet fan(me) vents on this history breaking week for Madonna and Mooriah....



I'ma about to go on a lamb killing spree.

I can't believe that slutacious bimbo with a super flat ass, Mariah, has went number 1 once again.

I admit it. I am jealous. I am mad and I ain't gonna take it no more.

Moo-riah, I don't want to touch your body, I want to touch your face, with my new timbos...

I haven't been this mad since the old king died.

Join me janatics...Join me on my mission. call all the radio stations and say "you ugly fat bitches. How dare you play Mariah and not Janet". Let 4 and 5 words be your weapons. Attack Janatics...Attack with everything you've got.

We must be avenged!! Janet must be avenged!!

The retarded kid at the front desk of my job is a Mariah fan. So about 11am I snuck in the fridge and got his lunch and ate it in the name of Janet Jackson fans everywhere. And that boy is emotional and plus sized so he started to cry when he discovered he had nothing to eat.

Serves him right. He shouldn't have been humming "Touch My Body" in the hallway last Tuesday

TAZ

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From Billboard

http://www.billboard.com/bbcom/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003784083

Two leading ladies, Mariah Carey and Madonna, leapfrog over Elvis Presley in the Billboard charts record book this week.

As expected, Mariah Carey moves past Elvis Presley and into sole possession of second place for most No. 1s in the rock era, as "Touch My Body" soars 15-1 on the Billboard Hot 100 to become her 18th chart-topper. With her album "E=MC2" yet to hit retail, Carey might equal the Beatles' record of 20 No. 1s before her set runs its course.

"Body's" blast to No. 1 is fueled by a record-setting debut week digital tally of 286,000 downloads. That sum, good enough for the No. 1 slot on Hot Digital Songs, surpasses the 277,000 downloads labelmate Rihanna opened with in the June 9, 2007, issue with her summer smash "Umbrella."

Presley will also be nudged from his standing as the artist with the most top 10s in the rock era, as Madonna surpasses him with her 37th top 10, "4 Minutes." The track, which features Justin Timberlake, clocks a 68-3 jump. Previous to the establishment of the Billboard Hot 100 in 1958, the industry standard chart was the Best Sellers in Stores tally, where Presley scored his first 12 top 10s.

Like Carey's "Touch," Madonna's Hot 100 jump is spurred by stupendous download sales. "4 Minutes" shifts 217,000 in its first week of wide release (it had been available as a Verizon exclusive) to enter Hot Digital Songs at No. 2.


This is the first time since Nielsen SoundScan began tracking digital sales in 2003 that two titles debut simultaneously on Hot Digital Songs with more than 200,000 downloads each. The week also marks the best single-week digital tally in either artist's career.