Sunday, June 1, 2008

STAR WARS: The Battle where your only weapons is your star power...




This week's battle takes place at the Cannes Film festival. The battle scene is a benefit auction, and the warriors are Madonna, hot off the heels of a number 1 album, and stealing a black baby from Africa; Sean 'Diddy' Combs; and George Clooney.




Round one easily went to Madonna who outclassed Diddy by merely taking lip gloss out of her purse, using it, and watching it sell for $472,000.00. Diddy was offering up 24-hours with Diddy which means you could hang with the mogul and super-ego for an entire day. It went for a mere $314,000.00. Madonna also saw a guitar from her last tour go for $472,000.00 as well.




Guess Diddy isn't the star he thought he was.




Then came the real war. Madonna VS George Clooney. The weapon was Sharon Stone. Last year a Sharon Stone/Clooney kiss went for $700,000.00. Ever the super ego, Madonna demanded a million for a smooch with co host Sharon Stone, and the crowd looked at her old ass as if she had bumped her head. Who wants to see too old gals kissing? Desperate, Madonna declared she would serenade fans backstage, and still even only got $550,000 for that.




Super Loser: Diddy


Loser: Madonna


Winner: George Clooney, AIDS victims the money went to, and Taz Jonez for not having to see two old gals kissing. If I want to see old broads co habitating, I'd watch the Golden Girls re runs with my gay Uncle Jarvis.




TAZ

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